Is social media causing low self-esteem in women?

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Today we are focusing on giving our mind a workout, with some thought provoking insights into the world of social media and its effect on how we think about ourselves and others.

Most of you would be very familiar with platforms like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr etc. It goes without saying that most people would have at least one social media account (and some of us have a good deal of them). Social media is a great tool to help people connect with others and through platforms like Facebook, many of you are able to keep in contact with family and friends all over the world, or follow your favorite celebrity on Twitter, or browse through amazing photographs on Tumblr - very cool! :)

Social media has changed the way we all use the internet and its intentions are to connect people, which is a great notion. However, social media also brings out some other interesting "trends", which highlights some important issues regarding users personal esteem and their "true self". Now, more than ever before, people are weighing their self-worth on how many Facebook "Fans" they have, if anyone "Liked" their post or how bad they felt when didn't have any messages in their inbox today telling them how totally inspirational they were! (This one I overheard while standing in line at the movie theater - seriously!)

Furthermore, there seems to be an increasing trend of the "Sending you all a sneaky bikini/underwear/abs/topless/nude shot" as if it was taken without their knowledge, or that the camera just happened to snap a photo of them, while they were holding it, with perfect hair and makeup, posing into the mirror, with an Instagram filter over it, with a matching pair of expensive underwear on...yes you get the picture! It was so "unexpected" that they had to post it to 15 000 people immediately! And re-tweet it for weeks after!


After chatting with some young women recently, they expressed their concerns about this type of thing happening on their social networks. Seeing other girls who posted staged "Kardashian-esque" photos of themselves day after day, updating their status multiple times per hour with what sounded like a life of grandeur, as if they themselves were starring in their own award winning reality show (the "reality" part is ironic!) 

After viewing this type of behavior, these women truly believed that these other people's realities must be so amazing and that their own lives/bodies/activities could not live up to these standards. In turn, what once was a place for seeing photos of their friends holiday in Brazil, quickly became the place in their minds that only these far more "popular" people could exist. 

However for these women, they found it interesting to see that while they thought they were suffering from low self-esteem, it was really the "poster" who needed the validation from others about their lifestyle or body. If no-one "Liked" their picture or told them they were amazing, then how were they going to get through the day!

"Researcher Soraya Mehdizadeh from York University in Canada asked 100 students, 50 male and 50 female, aged between 18 and 25 about their Facebook habits.

They all took psychology tests to measure their levels of narcissism, which the study defined as ‘a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and an exaggerated sense of self-importance’.

Those who scored higher on the narcissism test checked their Facebook pages more often each day than those who did not.

There was also a difference between men and women – men generally promoted themselves by written posts on their Facebook page while women tended to carefully select the pictures in their profile." (Published in the Journal of Cyberpsychology, Behaviour And Social Networking).

For women, young women especially, it can be hard these days to navigate oneself through the gauntlet of media that is fed to you each day, not to mention through the countless images are flashed before your eyes. There are whole websites dedicated to "thinspirations" and "fitspirations", not to mention thousands of hashtags, bitly links and Instagram uploads, all there telling you what to look like, what not to look like, how to live your life etc. It can be very overwhelming!


So how do you get through all this information and visual stimuli without going crazy and thinking you are not good enough?

1. Don't think too much into what other people post, the photos they put up (especially their "sneaky bikini/underwear/abs/topless/nude shots" (haha) or their supposedly Kardashian type lifestyles. They need the admiration of others to fuel their own purposes and that is something that they have to deal with. (It would also be very time-consuming posting, reposting, retweeting etc. all day long, so think of all the extra time YOU have to actually DO real things with your life).


2. A lot of images you will see have had careful planning. There are people that want you to think they look totally polished 24 hours a day! We all know this is not the case, so don't stress out. Just like in the magazines, a bit of editing or an Instagram filter will do wonders for a photo and it can look totally different to the original one. Also I have seen a lot of people post old photos of themselves doing fun things as if they happened last night, to give the illusion that they are living a nonstop rockstar life. Sad but true!


3. Find true role models who you look up to! There are plenty of fabulous people out there that can inspire you to be the best person you can be.


4. Let go of the obsession with who "Liked" your post, who commented on your wall (or if you are someone that has a public page) how many "fans" you have. Unless you are a business, then it really doesn't matter. There are no popularity police and judging yourself on what other people think of the photo you posted yesterday is not a productive way to live.


5. If you are someone that finds yourself constantly over exaggerating your lifestyle on social media then stop for a moment and think about why you are doing it? Is it to make yourself feel important? Is it to gain the admiration of others? Is it to give the illusion that you are living Richard Branson's life? (haha)


Don't get caught up in the "illusions" of social media. Believe in yourself and don't be distracted by what others are doing. Find some "true" role models and work on making your own life a fabulous one!


Be fit, well & vibrant :)


Courtney

Is technology making you gain weight?

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Hello Fitness Friends,

If you are reading this post then I know you are currently on the Internet, either accessing the website on your computer or through your phone. For a lot of you, this is not the first time you have logged on today, nor will it be the last time either. While online, you might also check out a few of your friends profiles, a celebrity blog or two, your favourite online store, download some music from iTunes and check your email. At the same time, you might also be texting your friends, looking at some photos in your gallery and browsing the App store on your iPhone, while you watch some TV and download the next episode (so you don't have to wait a week). Phew!

This might sound like a lot, but the funny thing is this is all completely normal technology use in 2012, especially with the introduction of laptops, smartphones and fast wireless internet.

I know a lot of people that run their lives in this fashion, opening 10 browser windows at a time so that they can peruse multiple sites in a few seconds, or press the refresh button countless times a day, to see if anyone has updated their Facebook profiles.

I see a lot of people at the gym slowly turning the peddles of the bike, too engrossed in their photo gallery to break a sweat.

I hear a lot of my clients say that they are so fatigued each morning and all throughout the day, usually because they were up all night playing games on the computer or watching TV.

While technology has given us so many great features, it is also important to step back and take note of the amount of time you are spending "wired" each day.

How many hours do you spend watching/downloading/uploading/posting/tweeting/viewing/sharing each day? (If your job requires you to do any of the above, then add those hours in too).

Imagine if you devoted 1 of those extra "tech" hours to exercise each day. Even if you already go to the gym, imagine adding an extra hour at the end of your day to walking, stretching, yoga/pilates, meditation etc.

Instead of coming home and jumping straight onto the computer or watching TV, have your gym attire ready and take some time for your health. You will find that you sleep better, have more energy and burn more calories.

Be active & well :)

Courtney

Courtney Barber for Slim Secrets - What to do after a bad food day

Hi Readers,

I found a great little graphic which really illustrates the importance of not "beating" ourselves up constantly about bad food choices or the occasional slip in your normal diet. Yes, everyone gets tempted by tasty treats and sometimes we slip into bad eating habits, but the important thing to remember is to:

a. Put down the rest of the (unhealthy food here)

b. Look at the reason why you binged

c. Understand the trigger (what is stress, boredom, tiredness etc)

d. Remember that there are plenty more meals to come in the week and one slip up does not equal doomsday, nor does it warrant you to throw in the towel and continue the cycle!

e. Pre plan your next meal and make sure it is something super healthy, to bring you back on track!

It's all about consistency, so keep this mind :)

Be fit!

Courtney

Courtney Barber for Slim Secrets - Are you allowing yourself to be happy & healthy?

How are you today?

Today we are looking your lifestyle on a deeper level, particularly the ways that you might stop yourself from really having what you want in life.

Ask yourself these questions:

- Do you always downplay your success around friends and family so that you "fit in"?

- Do you keep your dreams and goals to yourself, thinking that others will say they are ridiculous and not achievable?

- Do you find yourself sabotaging your own success, whether it be in your career, relationships or health?

- Are you easily swayed by people not to stick to your diet or workouts?

- Do you feel as though your friends become jealous if you start to lose weight and feel better?

- Do you think it's possible to really achieve your dream body?

- Do you exercise and eat properly for 2 weeks then throw in the towel, binge and start all over again?

If you answered yes to the majority of those questions, it illustrates that you may be sabotaging your own success because you truly don't think you have the right to look beautiful, feel amazing and regain your vitality.

Have a close look at the 6 people you spend the most time with. Do they represent your ideal lifestyle? Are they happy, healthy, have great relationships, supportive, motivating and inspiring?

You don't need to follow negative patterns or habits just because the people around you do. It's your life and if you want to see change then the only person that can make that happen is you!

If you want to kick start your fitness plan in December then do it! Don't let others sabotage your goals by telling you to wait until January. If you want to have a healthy holiday break without all the alcohol and sugary treats then go for it! 

Allow yourself to pass your own expectations. Believe that you can have the lifestyle that you desire. Strive to be healthy and don't feel bad when other people make negative comments about your choices. It's your life - live it!

Courtney